In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high
esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do
you know what I just heard about your friend?".
Socrates replied that before the man spoke, he needed to pass the “Triple-Filter” test.
The first filter, he explained, is Truth. “Have you made absolutely
sure that what you are about to say is true?” The man shook his head.
“No, I actually just heard about it, and …”
Socrates cut him off. “You don’t know for certain that it is true,
then. Is what you want to say something good or kind?” Again, the man
shook his head. “No! Actually, just the opposite. You see …”
Socrates lifted his hand to stop the man speaking. “So you are not certain that what you want to say is true, and it isn’t good or kind. One filter still remains, though, so you may yet still tell me. That is Usefulness or Necessity. Is this information useful or necessary to me?” A little defeated, the man replied, “No, not really.”
“Well, then,” Socrates said, turning on his heel. “If what you want to say is neither true, nor good or kind, nor useful or necessary, please don’t say anything at all.”
If we all filtered our speech in this way, whichever questions we ask ourselves, we could avoid a great deal of negativity.
The scripture (Proverbs 26:20) says, “Without wood a fire goes out, without gossip a quarrel dies down.”
We backbite to make ourselves appear a little higher, by cutting others down. We enjoy a moment of attention as our audience salivates over a fellow human's debasement. It is cheap glory, and it destroys camaraderie and collaboration.
Would you like to eradicate backbiting in your team or your organisation? Share this story with them and ask them to pledge to always use the triple filter test before saying something about a colleague.
Most importantly, do so yourself.
Socrates lifted his hand to stop the man speaking. “So you are not certain that what you want to say is true, and it isn’t good or kind. One filter still remains, though, so you may yet still tell me. That is Usefulness or Necessity. Is this information useful or necessary to me?” A little defeated, the man replied, “No, not really.”
“Well, then,” Socrates said, turning on his heel. “If what you want to say is neither true, nor good or kind, nor useful or necessary, please don’t say anything at all.”
If we all filtered our speech in this way, whichever questions we ask ourselves, we could avoid a great deal of negativity.
The scripture (Proverbs 26:20) says, “Without wood a fire goes out, without gossip a quarrel dies down.”
We backbite to make ourselves appear a little higher, by cutting others down. We enjoy a moment of attention as our audience salivates over a fellow human's debasement. It is cheap glory, and it destroys camaraderie and collaboration.
Would you like to eradicate backbiting in your team or your organisation? Share this story with them and ask them to pledge to always use the triple filter test before saying something about a colleague.
Most importantly, do so yourself.
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